7:42pm Well, that’s it from me. Thank you for reading along.
7:35pm One Battle After Another
7:28pm What was that??
7:25pm Will Smith mentioned.
7:22pm Regarding Michael B Jordan, wakka wakka!
7:14pm Lionel Ritchie. I don’t get it. What is it with old guys saying bizarre stuff at these things?
6:57pm Just picturing them forcing Martin Scorcese et al to wave glowsticks during the K-Pop Demon Hunters performance.
6:50pm Successfully keeping this within the bounds of good taste :)
6:38pm The President of the Academy is speaking, time for some housekeeping! It was funny when the Sound mixing lady had to get her piece of paper out in order to remember the words “Grandchildren” though.
6:33pm Just seems a little funny, right?
6:18pm Best Documentary Short, you know he thought about it.
6:13pm Okay here’s the Pedro Pascal Sigourney Weaver thing I was trying to post for the last 10 minutes.
6:11pm Josh Gad’s revenge; Substack is saying there are network issues and won’t let me upload anything???
5:58pm Barbra Streisand
5:51pm Probably gonna get yelled at for this one.
5:42pm The commercials are working on me!
5:35pm This bit is falling flat!
5:20pm Sean Penn walking up to accept his award (Imagine how hard this joke would have hit if Sean Penn had been there to accept his award.)
5:15pm Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango.
5:05pm First ever award for Best Casting Director. I don’t want to be too snarky, but I feel like I could have done this.
5:01pm Marty Supreme mentioned. Will bring this back if it wins anything.
4:53pm Stopped to make toast. Missed something.
Update, it was Frankenstein so who cares?
4:48pm Incredible news, I have won an award for Best Engraving Up To 40 Characters during the commercials.
4:44pm Imagine Barry Keoghan stepping out to use the toilet during the Sinners musical perfromance and not being allowed back in. (Vampire)
4:38pm Best animated short — thank you I’ll literally be here all night.
4:33 pm K-Pop Demon Hunters won which is cool but nothing funny is happening and I’m hungry. This is off to a great start.
4:29pm You learn something new every day.
4:11 pm We’re off to a great start, it’s been a while since I’ve used Substack so I can’t rememebr how to do it. Luckily it’s just the monologue, you can’t make jokes about jokes
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